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Ask Me Anything: Live Q&A about Seeking Outside Intervention on the Fertility Journey {EXPERT FERTILITY ADVICE}

Are you ready for another Q&A?!

How do you know when it’s time to seek outside help on your fertility journey? What KIND of specialist do you need for your case? Do you need a mindset coach or an actual therapist? An RE or an RI? An acupuncturist and herbalist? There are so many options and it’s hard to know which path to choose.

In this video I talk about some things to look for when deciding to work with someone AND I answer your questions about seeking additional help on your fertility journey.

SEE BELOW FOR FULL TRANSCRIPT OR CLICK ON THE IMAGE ABOVE FOR FULL VIDEO.

Oh, are we live? We are live. Hello everyone. Hi, how are you? Hello, hello, hello. It is that time again where I get to come to you live and talk all the things. Let’s see as you guys are rolling on, hello, hello, hello. I am Aimee of AimeeRaupp.com. And as always, it’s Thursday, I get to come to you live and share tips and tools and strategies so you can live your best life. And importantly, for a lot of women who follow me, I have a lot of new followers here constantly. Thank you so much, on Facebook and on Instagram. It’s time for you to bring a child through, right? That’s what you’re longing. That’s what you’re desiring. I’m here for you guys.

So those of you that are new to me… I have something in my eye. I am a licensed acupuncturist and herbalist. I’ve been in clinical practice, it’ll be 18 years in December. So 17 and a half years. Prior to becoming an acupuncturist and herbalist, I have a biology and a chemistry degree. I have a almost completed master’s in neuroscience. And over the years I have written a handful of books, four to be exact. My latest one is called the Egg Quality Diet. It came out just a year ago. And over the years though, I’ve done a lot of studying, continued education in reproductive medicine and biology, functional medicine. I am your fertility detective. I do know a lot about the Western side of things, the Eastern side of things, and I’ve really come at you with all of that to support you. And I was a research scientist before I became an acupuncturist, so research is really important to me and finding the best data and the best approach to support all of you on your path to optimal health and fertility.

And as you can tell, over the years, I’ve grown a great business where I’m not just in a clinic anymore seeing patients, I actually have a whole online business where we support women all over the world looking to optimize their health and their fertility. And at this point too, I now have three fertility coaches that work on Team Aimee. Two of them are actually associates of mine in my acupuncture clinics and have been with me for over a decade each. And then we have another new associate in our Westport clinic, Marilyn Olivia, who’s amazing. And I have a brand new fertility coach, Carrie Hart, who’s also been an acupuncturist and herbalist for over a decade. And so together we’re an amazing team of clinicians.

And then recently over the last year as well, I have brought on a team psychotherapist because seeing just the amount of trauma and stress that impacts all of you on the fertility journey. And even though I’m deep into mindset work and spirituality, and really helping, I wrote a book called Body Belief. It’s all about how our beliefs dictate our behavior and our behavior dictates our health. And really into belief systems and reworking them, I saw it as time to bring on an actual trained psychotherapist with training specifically in trauma. Because, there are just certain things that my team or I, as acupuncturists and herbalist, we don’t have the skill set. We’re not trained psychotherapists. And I really wanted to offer the best support to all of our clients. So there’s a bit about me.

And that lead in is really about what today is. Today is an asking me anything day, and the topic is asking me anything about whether or not you need more support on your fertility journey. When is it time to call in outside intervention, say like a fertility coach, like myself or my team, or acupuncture, or to get another opinion from another doctor? Or is it time to go and do traditional psychotherapy with EMDR or trauma work? Is it time to get more functional medicine testing? Should you do a GI map? Should you do the Dutch test? Right. So that’s what today’s all about. If you want to bring your questions and then ask me, like, when is it time? Do I need another opinion? Should I dig deeper?

Just before in my private community, one of the women, I urged her to get an endometrial biopsy because she had had a miscarriage and she had had some unsuccessful IVF transfers. And she also shows signs of candida. She’s had chronic bacterial vaginosis or not chronic. She’s had bacterial vaginosis a few times. And I suspected if the bacterial vaginosis is there, if the yeast that the candida is there and she’s got symptoms of both, chances are she has a microbiome issue. We should look at her endometrial lining, making sure that there’s no additional uterine infection that’s impacting pregnancy, because it will. And it most definitely does. And sure enough, it came back. And so we’re now talking about like, okay, is there additional testing? What else should we do to manage that gut health and the microbiome?

I was able to go to an immunologist because of you. And he is sending all the tests recommended. So thankful for you. Aw, Andy, while you’re welcome. Thank you. It makes me emotional to think about it. It’s like my number one mission, right? Is to really give you guys the tools to advocate for yourself and get the testing and the information you need and you deserve. And that’s my entire team, and we’ll get into it a little bit. Was fertility focused, following your diet and got a mild case of COVID. Now I’m having random symptoms, not sure what direction to go in functional doctor or something else.

I would look at a functional doctor. I think that’s a good question. I would also go back to the diet because the anti-inflammatory aspects of the Egg Quality Diet are really key in helping heal. If there’s any long term COVID symptoms. I mean, I’ve seen that a lot now. But something like one thing I like to do with my clients and I can now do in the state of Connecticut is what’s called a micronutrient panel. And it’s extensive blood work. It’s much deeper dive than just the traditional CBC, complete blood count. But we’re looking at like all of your micronutrients and the status of them in your body, not just like B12 and folate or CoQ10, but your like omega3 to 6 ratio, your zinc, your magnesium, your selenium, all sorts of micronutrients, which can really help us then cater to you and what you need.

I don’t know if any of you noticed, but there was an article that came out, let me just see, okay, no comments here, last week in The Cut, I think it was called. It’s an online magazine or something like that. And it was about fertility coaches. And so that inspired me to host this live today, too, to just support you guys in, like, where are you? And when do you need to call in more support? Because there is so much information out there for you now, right? There’s all these books. And a lot of them recommend testing. I know my books recommend testing. So say you go and get all those tests. Then what? Who’s going to help you unpack that? Who’s going to help you individualize a plan? Do you have someone that you can trust that’s kind of really seeing all the aspects of your case?

But what I thought about the article that came out, it wasn’t entirely positive about fertility coaches. And I wanted to really sit with you guys and make a distinction of like, we have to call ourselves fertility coaches, even though we’re clinicians. So everyone on my team, we call ourselves coaches because we’re working with women all over the world and we don’t have our license, if you will, for acupuncture in every single state or every single country. You just can’t do that. It’s impossible. So legally you have to call yourself a coach. But, we are also legally allowed to give advice based on our clinical training. And so there’s all these legalities around it. But, there’s a lot of coaches out there that actually don’t have any medical training or any clinical training.

I actually think the clinical training is the key. There’s a lot of people out there who are experts in their field who have written books and have never seen an actual single patient in the clinic. At the height of my acupuncture clinic, I was seen upwards of 60 to 80 patients a week, a week for a decade. So you do the math. I mean, I saw thousands of patients and so have all of the associates and coaches that work on Team Aimee. And that’s a huge piece to me because that’s how we really learn. We’re in the dirt with you guys. I get to see a hundred different lab results and a hundred different thyroid results and a hundred thousand different transfers. And what worked and what didn’t, what test did this doctor do, what test did this doctor not do. To really then bring to you this like full clinical picture of how to best support you on your journey.

And this article in The Cut was really pointing out that there’s a lot of coaches out there charging a good amount of money. I’m not going to say I’m cheap, because I’m not. But I do feel like I’ve earned it. 20 years of clinical experience, four books, thousands of pregnancies under my belt, I feel like I’ve earned it. My coaches are less expensive, and we do that on purpose because they come to me and we’re trying to make a price point that’s to you guys. But there are people out there that are charging a good amount of money for fertility coaching that have zero clinical experience, that have zero medical training, that maybe have personal experience with fertility journey, which I think is a beautiful way to support your peers.

But for you all to know, what are you getting? Who is this person? How are they trained? Is this a peer to peer relationship? Is she going to be able to hold space for me knowing how difficult the fertility journey is because she’s seen it, she’s been through it? But I also mentioned that girls on my team, we’re in there with you. We know the journey as well, which I think is something really important even as clinicians to share. Versus is this someone with clinical experience who has seen thousands of patients and can really help identify what are the missing pieces to my case, right? So for all of you to really understand, like so and so might be less expensive as a fertility coach than this other person, but what are you getting with that? And is there medical expertise? Or is there just, and not that it’s just, people have been through a lot and they have learned a lot.

I always say some of my girls have PhDs in fertility and that’s kind of a joke, but like there’s no such thing, but meaning they know a ton about fertility now and hormones. However, they learned about their body and what worked for themselves on their journey. And as we know, we cannot generalize. This is very individualized medicine. It needs to be because every single person is different. So understanding where you’re getting the support, who you’re getting it from and what your expectations should be of that. ‘Cause I think everyone has great intentions, right? Everyone’s there, we’re all there to support and cheer each other on. But, just as I talk about in all of my books, if you’re looking for an acupuncturist, these are the things that I think you should look for. They should have this certification and this certification, right? So same thing with any of these coaches there.

How often do you recommend acupuncture during follicular phase to improve egg quality? Do you recommend acupuncture during menstrual phase as well? I usually will recommend, I mean, acupuncture once a week, I think is a great addition to anybody’s life. For some people that can be cost or time prohibitive. So ideally even just twice a month, I think is amazing. Once during follicular phase kind of around leading up to ovulation, and then once during luteal phase to help things hold and stick, if we’re trying to conceive. If we’re preparing for an IVF or retrieval, I like to see them at least two times during the stem phase, so during the follicular phase. Typically, unless the period is very painful or uncomfortable or you get a migraine or something like that with your period, I don’t do acupuncture on the heavy days of a menstrual period, but sometimes it falls that way and it’s perfectly fine.

It’s not a negative thing, but I’m always very, something I’m working on. I’m very protective of how you all spend your money and your time. And that’s really not my business. So in an ideal situation, you’re getting acupuncture every single week and we change it based on where you are in your cycle. If that’s too much for your life and in your timeframe and your purse then every other week I think is phenomenal to get done.

Let me see. Okay. There’s some comments here on how the heck do I see the comments? Okay. I was recently diagnosed. Oh, let’s see. Okay. Yeah. The Q and A is about knowing what outside experts we need. Let’s see. Okay. So yeah, but I think this is a good case, a good question though, Tanya, that I can use as a driving point. So like Dr. Dirvala. So I just heard about Dr. Dirvala, and we were putting him on our referral page, which is really just an inside page, but it’s for all of our people. My B12 is abnormally elevated, so should I stop taking my prenatal? So this is where I would say you would be a great candidate for working with a coach, like someone on my team, because a lot of us, not all of us have the functional medicine training, but we understand functional medicine. We’ve been dealing with supplements for a very long time. We’ve been looking at labs for a very long time. So we can help unpack this for patients, which I think is so important because what we see all the time when people come to us, either in the clinic or online is they are taking way too many supplements and they are not getting the most benefit out of them because they’re kind of inundating their body with more than what they actually need.

How do you find the best acupuncture provider? I have seen two different naturopathic doctors and they both did acupuncture differently. So acupuncture is an art, not a science, if you will. Just like reproductive medicine, it’s science based, but it’s an art as I always say. And so not any acupuncturist is going to be the same. Even the ones on my team. I don’t train them in acupuncture, right? I train them in all the other stuff, the diet, the supplements, the lifestyle, the mindset. Acupuncture is an art. We all went to similar schools. We have similar training. We feel pulses, we look at tongues. The key to finding a good [inaudible 00:15:19] picture, not just stick needles in you and leave the room. I want someone who’s looking at your diet, someone who’s talking to you about supplements, someone who’s talking to you about lifestyle, someone who’s feeling your pulses, looking at your tongue, where you leave feeling very nourished and supported. That’s really important.

So a lot of times that means asking friends, like who did you have a good experience with? Or now every town has those like Facebook pages, like asking on there of like any recommendations for a good Chinese medicine practitioner. I do like to see that they have the NCCAOM degree. I’d love them to be herbalist. I do think acupuncturists that also are practicing herbalist are just a little more fine tuned. I thank you my team that is true. I also have a blog post on this. And I also touch upon this in all of my books. But, I think that’s a good question for here too, because a lot of people wonder like, should I call an acupuncture? Is it a really important piece to the fertility puzzle?

And the way we practice in our clinics is I think hell yeah. Because we’re not just sticking needles in our patients, which just needles alone actually will improve circulation and blood flow. They will regulate the immune system. They will calm the nervous system. All of that will benefit you on your fertility journey. But what’s nice about my team and myself, and I have a lot of colleagues that practice this way too, so I’m not just saying it’s just me. There’s a lot of amazing, amazing practitioners out there who practice acupuncture and who are also really well versed in fertility and infertility treatments, and in supplements and in diet. And we become part of your team. We’re part of your coaching system, right? We’re part of, as some of my patients call it, the bump squad, right? Helping you get to baby.

And so what I see with clients that come to see me in the clinic or any of my practitioners, right? We have clinics in New York city, in Nyack, New York and Westport, Connecticut. They feel ridiculously supported and heard because we understand what FSH means. We know what Antral follicle count is. We know what IVF is. We know what 350 versus 150 Follistim is, right? We know at all. We know tests to recommend, we know what your thyroid should be, right? That’s the kind of additional care that you need and deserve.

So many times I see women that come to me and they’re completely overwhelmed. They don’t know the right questions to ask their doctor. They don’t know if their thyroid should be supported or should not be supported. They don’t know who to believe. Should I be taking a prenatal with folic acid or with methylfolate? Should I be on extra B12? How much fish oil should I be taking? Do I really need fish oil? People are talking about mercury, right? You need someone to help you navigate all that because it’s completely overwhelming. There are a lot of women out there that are self starters and can get some books and download that information that way and make their own plan. But most people need extra support. And so in my opinion, when you call in an acupuncturist, ideally they’re also a herbalist, and they’re also well versed in the world of fertility.

There is an additional certification that a lot of acupuncturists can get. It’s called the ABORM, A-B-O-R-M. Ironically, I do not have the certification, but I very much am in support of it. I just never have gotten around to taking the test because it’s always offered. Anyway, it’s a long story, but ABORM certification does show you that the acupuncturist you’re working with is very well versed in the field of fertility and reproductive medicine. I thought I saw, okay…

A new acupuncture is talking about DNA fragmentation, is that legit? It is very legit the DNA fragmentation. I will say though, it is an added cost. And the results, if they come back that the sperm is fragmented, the support is still the same. So if you go, and if you have a copy of my book, the Egg Quality Diet, you have then access to the resources page that comes with that book, which I have volumes of information on that resources page, including the healthy daddy diet and the supplements. I have a whole video and then a supplements. If you are suspecting like deeper underlying sperm issues that are causing the fertility challenges, which there very well could be as there usually are, just get your guy on the healthy daddy diet and those supplements that I talk about in there. So if you don’t have the Egg Quality Diet, go out and spend the 17 bucks on the Egg Quality Diet and get access to that resources page, because it’s literally thousands of dollars of information, just all in there.

And again, based on almost 20 years of clinical experience, and knowing that like Aimee works with fertility doctors. Aimee has mutual respect with multiple different fertility doctors who look to her, who appreciate her work. And so understanding that I have definitely done my research and I have definitely seen, this is the diet, these are the supplements. These are the most important things to do for improving sperm health. So whether or not you get that DNA fragmentation test done, you could also just assume like, okay, I’m just going to put them on this plan for the next three months and let’s just see, because that alone could do it. Some people need the test because they need the results and they want to see that they improve. Other people, they don’t necessarily need it. In my opinion, if you’re trying to make a baby, you really have to think about sperm health too. So your man, if you’re in a heterosexual relationship, should be at the minimum taking the supplements. But ideally also following the diet with you and supporting you in that capacity.

Okay. Let’s see any more questions. So again, we’re talking about when is the right time for me to get more support? How do I decipher if I need more support? How to decipher if this is the right coach for me? Right? Or the right clinician, or the right test for me to get done? And again touching upon this article that came out in The Cut last week, talking about fertility coaches, and that I think the biggest thing for us to take away just like we know with doctors, just like we know with reproductive endocrinologists, not everyone is the same and not everyone has the same level of experience, right? So not every RE has experience with recurrent pregnancy loss, and they might not see the need for doing a complete clouding factor panel or looking at immunological factors that are impacting your ability to get and stay pregnant.

So for you to just kind of like take that all in of like who’s the right fit for me? What am I hoping to get out of this? And really do your research because you want on your team, people who are clinically experienced, who have seen cases like yours, not just once, and nor have they lived through it themselves just once, which there’s valuable experience there. I’m not putting it down. But, have seen clinically like dozens of your case and know like, “Oh, you need to go into this category. Oh, you need to go into this category.” Right?

How much do fertility clinics really differ? My current acupuncturist doesn’t think my switching clinics will provide a better experience because she thinks the industry is the issue with my feeling bad about the care I’m receiving. I have seen that. I think the smaller clinics as I call them the boutique clinics offer a little more personalized individual care. I always think that like if you have an instinct, so I think there are differences in clinics of like, and I’m going to totally generalize here, so forgive me. But like if you’re in your mid thirties and your FSH is great and your AMH is great and you have a ton of eggs in there, you’d probably be fine at like a very large clinic where there’s a very standard protocol. You’re going to do 350 Follistim and 150 or whatever [inaudible 00:23:32], right? But if you’re a case that is as, I mean, I don’t like these terms, these are their terms, poor responder. You have premature ovarian insufficiency. You have high FSH, you have low AMH. You’re going to do better at a clinic who is going to individualize the treatment for you.

If you have multiple failed transfers, you might consider a different clinic, right? So I think it’s more about the case. And I also think of it’s about expectation. Are you going there because this is a good fertility clinic and maybe you get insurance coverage, maybe you don’t? Are you going there because they have good results? Somebody else has worked with them and maybe the doctor doesn’t have the nicest bedside manner and you feel disappointed by that. So there’s that of like, okay, what are my expectations here? I just need a good fertility doctor. I don’t need him to be my best friend or her to be my best friend. I don’t need my fertility doctor to believe that methylfolate is more important than folic acid, or that I should be on an anti-inflammatory diet. Don’t need them to have a nutrition degree, right? Or a supplement degree. Not that there’s a degree in supplements. But I think you get what I’m trying to say.

But, if you are not getting the results at the clinic and they’re not thinking outside the box each time your case goes on, like every new cycle they should be trying something different. They should be looking at something different. If they haven’t checked your thyroid, if they’re not like supporting that, if they haven’t checked your thyroid antibodies. If they dismiss you when you ask for certain tests, then a hundred percent, you should go to a different clinic. You need someone on your team who actually believes you can do this. And you need someone who’s willing to think outside the box, who’s willing to go kind of like in the rabbit hole with you and say, “You know what? What we just did didn’t work. So what are we going to do next? How are we going to try things differently?” So that’s where I think that the premise for choosing a different clinic comes in. But I do always think getting more than one opinion and having more than one doctor look at your case is really important.

I’m 44, recently had an abnormal test result from my prolactin. It was high. Is there some sub… So this isn’t really about, this isn’t a Q and A about that. But again, this is where you do great working with a fertility coach that is a clinician who has clinical experience dealing with high prolactin. So, I’m not going to specifically answer the question, and sometimes there’s medication. You need someone who’s going to come in and help you break that down. That’s where you do need and should seek out additional support here because having hormone imbalances, including high prolactin or high DHEA, or things like that, or cortisol issues, cortisone issues can severely impact your ability to get and stay pregnant. So then that’s when you want to go to a clinician who has experience, not some Googling, learning, educating yourself so important, but like where is that information coming from, and who are you choosing to work with? That’s the most important thing to me that you’re getting the right support from a clinician who has seen high prolactin.

Pause due to poor connection. Okay. I recently switched clinics because I did not like my doctor. I was scared the switch would set me back, but I’m already so much happier. See, that’s it too, advocating for yourself. I mean, I feel like half of my job is pointing out what tests haven’t been done and what tests we need to get done. A quarter of my job is helping you advocate for yourself, right? That’s probably same in that testing. And then it’s all the other things. I’m sorry, my Instagram keeps going in and out due to poor connection, so hopefully it just stays because we’re almost done here. But yeah. Good for you for advocating for yourself.

So again, Peterson 0430, this isn’t really a question for that. So that’s again, where having more support on your team is, I should say for this Q and A that’s not really a specific question, but it does tell me that it’s… I know there’s an expense. Like I know my coaches, I think they’re 325 for a 60 minute session, right? But you get a really decent breakdown and a follow up of like your next steps and a plan. To spend that 300 bucks I know is a big expense for so many people. And I’m not saying that you should haphazardly ever throw money around. But to get quality care and guidance and support on your journey from clinicians who have been doing this for multiple decades, who have seen thousands of patients, is invaluable. Instead of trying to piece it all together yourself, which can be completely overwhelming.

And so to think about that too, of like, okay, is this the best protocol for me? We can go down onto all the Google forums and you’re going to see individual responses because each woman is going to have a different reaction to that cycle, right? And so instead of though, actually seeing a clinician that has seen 10 different women on that same cycle and can tell you like, “This is what I usually see, this is what I don’t see. Or have you tried that before? Maybe this is the right approach, right?” But then there’s also the piece too, of like, if you don’t want to go in a higher extra support and you really do just want the answer, ask yourself this question too, do I trust my doctor? Because I’m paying them for a service. I feel that with my clients, if you don’t trust me, then we shouldn’t be together. Because then what’s the point, right? If you’re going to second guess every single thing I say, then we’re not the right fit, right? But if you’re going to have someone on your team, you better trust them because they’re helping you make a child, which is a huge thing. So to really step back and think about that of like instead of second guessing or micromanaging every single thing that gets done in your cycle, do I have a level of trust with this person?

And I also will say, I understand how traumatic and painful this process is, and how hard it is to rebuild trust in something that this situation hasn’t been working out well for you so far. So I understand that side of it. But, I want you to have on your team, on your side, people that you trust, that you respect, that you admire, that you think are smart, that you know have your back. Really important.

Will this live be saved? Yes, it is. All my lives are always saved. Everything gets saved to YouTube. It Instagram always stays on here. So yes, we have your back. Okay. Oh Anna, I hope that was helpful. You are welcome. Okay. So let me just see, okay. Yeah. We have referrals for our clients, of course. There’s some great fertility clinics in New York City. I do often collaborate with one of my favorite fertility doctors in New York City. So just look for any of those collaborations and you’ll see who that is. And I practice out of his clinic in Westport, Connecticut. So yeah. So there’s some great doctors out there. There really are. And yeah. Okay. This question does not pertain today’s topic. Let me just see, okay.

Yeah. Best way to get your womb, so again, like I have books on that. I have a lot of information and Yes You Can Get Pregnant on that. So that’s where I would start for you. Go read Yes You Can Get Pregnant, and follow all the steps that I have in there. Because there is a very clear outline in Yes You Can Get Pregnant, on the best way to prepare your palace when heading into pregnancy, whether it’s with naturally or with IVF. Okay guys. So I’m going to go because I have a one o’clock call, and yeah. But this was a good conversation. And I think the biggest takeaway that I hope you all have is finding a team that you can trust, that has your back, that is cheering for you. That is looking at the current research, that has loads of clinical experience to support you. It’s really important. The clinician piece is super important. Okay. Have a beautiful day. Wishing knew all the best.

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Disclaimer: Please keep in mind that I am not a medical doctor. I have been a practitioner of Traditional Chinese Medicine for over 17 years and I will be speaking from my clinical experience helping thousands of women conceive. The office of Aimee E. Raupp, M.S., L.Ac and Aimee Raupp Wellness & Fertility Centers and all personnel associated with the practice do not use social media to convey medical advice. This video will be posted to Aimee’s channels to educate and inspire others on the fertility journey.

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